I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
