Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
