I must be too annoying 4 u.
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
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