I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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