I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, jail baloney is awful.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
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