just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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