it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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