My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
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