There is no way he is gay with that hair.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Randomize
