called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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