whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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