you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Randomize