i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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