I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
You pole danced in your parka.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
