Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
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