WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
