the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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