belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize