we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
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