I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize