she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
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Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize