I'm really into asian looking animals
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
