I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
