So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
