do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
