I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad