What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
