Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
