So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
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