Nicole vs. Life
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
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