absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
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