im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize