my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
