Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
