Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Randomize
