There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize