am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize