As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
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