Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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