Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
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