I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Randomize
