If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
