Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
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