I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
