Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
