Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
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A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
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He better not be in your backpack
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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