Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
