Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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