You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Randomize
