i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Randomize
