I am full of burrito and curiosity
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Randomize
