Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
