ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Randomize
